Sunday, July 25, 2010

Did I pass the test?

I feel like I might have been undergoing a test yesterday. Me and my hubs went to a BBQ at a friend's house, which we go to every year. It's always a great party, a few people I know and several that I don't...always a great crowd. So I'm sitting there talking to my friend's parents and another person comes up to say "hi" to them...she's obviously pregnant, they ask when she's due and what does she say...December 10th. The exact same day that "B" and I would have been due. I immediately felt weak, dizzy, on the verge of tears (thank God for sunglasses!)

That made things tough for awhile but then a little later, we go in for a cool off in the house and a bunch of other people come in and another guest comes in with her two kids and I can't remember what she was talking about but she said something about the only boys in her family all having the same birthday...the day was the exact month and day of our m/c.

What are the odds that of the 365 days in a year the only 2 dates I heard all day were the 2 dates linked with our little angel baby?!? Okay, so I calculated the odds and it's 0.5% chance!!!

So, did I pass the test? I don't know, but I made it through the day. It was a wonderful BBQ, as always, but it was an emotional rollercoaster for me. I'm still emotional about it but I'm not a basketcase. What caught me off-guard more than anything was my physical reaction...after hearing the due date thing and for a couple hours afterward I felt so weak, shaky, dizzy, and at times a little nauseous. Sigh.


mama k said...

That sucks. I say you passed.

Anonymous said...

Aw Sis! I agree...that totally sucks. I think you passed too. Flying colors, girl!! ~Wen

Rhapsody B. said...

It is just God's way of saying you are stronger than you think and yes you absolutely pass the test.

Keep your head up and stay blessed.

Dirkey said...

That does suck and I do say that you passed. A day at a time is all you can do.